How to heal a broken heart

Bob Graham wrote an excellent picture book called How to Heal a Broken Wing, the book follows a pigeon with a broken wing and the boy who helps it. There's a very vegan message of empathy, respect, and kindness towards all creatures and I highly recommend you check it out.

As you would have noticed, I have been absent from blogging for quite some time. The reason for this is that after 6 years together, Jeff and I split up. As I'm sure you can appreciate, this has been devastating and heart-wrenching for me, so I hit the pause button on my life and went to curl up by myself for a bit. I'm just starting to emerge back out into the world now, but the sadness and the grief is still there, and I'm still completely heartbroken.

Bob Graham writes that a broken wing can sometimes heal with rest, and time, and a little hope. But how does one heal a broken heart? Not with Breakup Pudding from PETA's Vegan College Cookbook, that's for sure! In my happily coupled-up days, I'd always wanted to make this recipe but never got around to it. Then when I found myself alone and facing suffocation under an ever-increasing mountain of snotty tissues, I thought yes, now's the time.

This pudding is not for the faint hearted. It contains 10 tablespoons of sugar and though it professes to feed 4, I dispute that claim. This is 10 tablespoons of sugar for 1 person. Along with the entire sugar stocks of Australia, the pudding also requires a whopping 8 tablespoons of unsweetened cocoa powder, 1 pack of silken tofu, 2.5 teaspoons of vanilla extract, and a pinch of salt. Then you simply blend it all until smooth and chill. The end result comes out like this (please excuse the poor quality of the photo, I was not in a good state of mind):

Is it possible to feel worse after your life partner has just abandoned you, you know you're going to be alone forever, and you find yourself curled up on the lounge watching 500 Days of Summer while wearing a jumper that says 'I Like Cats' and crying into your breakup pudding? Well, no, but it is possible to feel very very sick on top of that. Was it eating my own weight in sugar? No, I don't believe so, though that did cause my heart to race at an extraordinary speed. Was it eating a pudding made for 4 people in one sitting? No, that's not really out of the ordinary for me. No, it was the absurd amount of cocoa, I'm talking so much cocoa that it burns the back of your throat as you're eating it. The problem is, the ratio of cocoa to water was, well, non-existent. This meant that the cocoa created a sort of thick gel in my stomach and couldn't continue down into my small intestine which resulted in terrible nausea and a great amount of vomiting. On the plus side, the relief that one experiences post-vomit was probably the emotional highlight of my day.

So if you're ever heartbroken, I suggest that you ignore PETA's advice and do not eat their breakup pudding, even though sugary, chocolaty gloop is exactly what you feel you need. I think Bob Graham is probably on the right track, the only things that really heal a broken heart are rest, time, and a little hope.

Happy (not) eating...and here's to hope.